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zylaa
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schooling part time
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Friday, August 6, 2010

Just reached home from werk to school.. awaits for the bus which took very long.. it was full with ppl.. i took the 3rd bus.. my ezlink card again.. need to be top up... i didnt expect that i will be cramped in the middle with lots of ppl.. it was really stuffy in the bus.. i couldnt breathe any fresh air at all... inform boifren that the bus was stuffy and i felt weak at that moment.. but boifren doesnt seem to be replying my msg.. i hold on till i reached my bustop... haiz.. i felt like vomitting in the bus when i was at bukit panjang.. i hold on to it.. i dun have any sweets at all... my head was giddy and i can blackout at anytime.. wanted to msg boifren.. but.. he wont be replying.. he might be sleeping...haiz...walk slowly from the bustop till my house.. while walking the feeling of vomitting was there... i walk even slower.. walk and walk... reached under void deck.. quickly take the lift and walk to my house.. reached home.. straight away i go to the toilet.. called boifren after that.. but he didnt sleep at all.. he was watching tv.. he sounds angry.. so we hung up the phone... haiz...

i wonder.. if i could change my features like a chinese gerl or japanese gerl like wat boifren always like to see.. days by days.. everytime i went out with him...there must be something that always hurts me alot.. yeah.. i noe.. boifren like chinese gerls.. but... haiz... i wonder if i could change my face, the way i make up like them.. haiz.. i felt jealous at times whenever i see his frens with their gerlfrens or other couples we very happy with each other... it doesnt mean that im not happy with boifren.. wat i mean is the way the couple to each other.. so like... i dunnoe how to say... the boifren will hug the gerlfren while walking.. holding each others hand.. carry their bags... i noe boifren wont carry my bag of course.. when it comes to me and boifren... boifren will either push my hand away or he will ignore about it.. he will tend to do something.. take something out from his pocket or walk with his hand in the pocket... i want boifren to be like.. so pampered to me.. he hug me.. he holds my hand.. hmm...

i miss boifren so much... i wish i could meet him tmr.. if he doesnt meet me tmr.. it would be a long long day for me to wait to meet him.. syg i miss u alot.. i miss being so pampered with him... haiz..





zylaa sign off
@Friday, August 06, 2010